Get a Raise in Any Economy
Dear Dr. Gluss,
Recently, I received great news about a promotion and a very substantial raise. At first, I was ecstatic, but as I get closer to starting my new job, I find myself getting more and more anxious. I know it is normal to have some anxiety before beginning a new job, but this feels very extreme. I'm not quite sure why having all this great success is making me feel so nervous. Shouldn't I feel thrilled all the time?
Carl in Sacramento, California
Great success can be paradoxical. While making our dreams come true, success can bring out our worst fears and anxieties. Maybe we feel that we are not good enough for the job or that we are guilty for being successful because we know that others had to suffer so we could prosper. Whatever the case, a dream come true may also signal the beginning of a nightmare. That nightmare is that we will be vulnerable to all our insecurities. In order to stop that nightmare, we may self-sabotage and engage in destructive behavior just to relieve some of the pressure. Since the road to success can be one requiring great force and veracity, the attainment of success can bring out our deepest fears in our ability to maintain our success. These insecurities can be very uncomfortable and we may do everything we can to avoid the anxiety, including sabotaging our success. Some of the most common ways of self-sabotaging are:
Finally, don't be afraid to celebrate your achievement and rejoice in the fact that your hard work has paid off. But get ready to be on the edge of your seat as you manage the complexities of your new job, knowing all the time that you have the talent to succeed.
Please note that the opinions expressed in this column are only for advice purposes. They do not represent a professional therapeutic relationship with Dr. Gluss. If you are in need of psychological help, please contact a referral source in your area to receive the psychological help you require.
Dr. Gluss is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist, a respected film and television consultant, a noted seminar leader, and an acclaimed author. Dr. Gluss is the co-founder of KEYLIGHT, a Consulting Company and DAIS, a Platform for Executive Coaching, Public Speaking, and Corporate Seminars. He is the author of the book Reel People: Finding Ourselves in the Movies.
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